Welp, we’ve reached peak absurd. Just when I thought the City of Santa Barbara couldn’t possibly be more hostile toward the children and families who eke out an existence here, the city’s Park and Rec Department cracked down on the illicit activities of a retired hobbyist who blows bubbles for an audience of mostly toddler groupies.
Santa Barbara’s motto should officially be changed to “Get Off My Lawn!” I’ve long opined to no one in particular that this is where the “Get Off My Lawn!” crowd comes to retire and die. Too many folks here make a pastime of complaining about kids having fun in public spaces, and the city is only too happy to oblige.
I shouldn’t be surprised. This is the city that elected — twice! — a guy who called the cops on children for playing basketball during the weekend on a school court near his house. While he’s since moved away, the idea that Santa Barbarans shouldn’t have to tolerate the sound of kids enjoying themselves outdoors persists. It turns out the Fun Police live here.
Seriously, who leans on such a technicality to shut down a free bubble display enjoyed by (clutching my pearls) a few dozen children and their desperate-to-get-the-kids-out-of-the-house-on-a-Saturday parents?
The same department that also tried to slather over historic Latino artwork and murals on the city’s Eastside after decades of underinvestment in the parks serving those residents.
The same department that lets a children’s wading pool sit unusable for years, drains the others before late-summer heatwaves, slashes public pool hours during the summer, and charges parents well over $100 for a few hours of basic recreation classes for kids. Who can even afford that?
The fact that the city had to investigate what soapy solution the Bubble Guy was using is laughable. Did someone think he was unleashing zeppelins of RoundUp upon the tots of Santa Barbara?
Who complains about good clean fun?!?! Who complains about children finding a little bit of joy at our public parks?!?! And what kind of bureaucracy caves to those frivolous grievances with such a draconian response?!
Clearly, the “Get Off My Lawn!” crowd doesn’t understand how few free, safe, and enjoyable activities exist for kids in Santa Barbara.
I recently attended a conference hosted by teen leaders from Santa Barbara. With exasperation, they pointed out that they have virtually no affordable, accessible social spaces. Outside of the bowling alley — which costs more by the minute than a ticket to Disneyland by the way — they’re left with little to do. Karaoke, I was told, is only available at our downtown bars.
No doubt we have amazing cultural institutions that cater to younger kids and families — the MOXI, the Zoo, the Botanic Garden — but those places are not free. The point is that overall, we lack free, enjoyable spaces for kids of any age to just be kids. And apparently, there’s a limit to how much fun you can have in our city parks.
Santa Barbara voters just passed yet another self-imposed tax increase. Our City Council should prioritize funding the Parks & Rec Department to expand free or truly affordable, safe, and accessible spaces and activities for all kids. Fix our wading pools. Expand public pool hours in the summer. Add shade structures to our playgrounds. Support programming for children and teens. And stop being the Fun Police.
And one last plea, please clean the restrooms at Oak Park.