The Maps of Isla Vista

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They — the ever elusive “they” — say beauty is in the eye of the beholder. So exactly whose eyes are laid on Isla Vista? I’ve got a collection of no less than 10 maps of our little community for you so you can see just who’s looking at us — and how. Oh, and for your viewing pleasure, I’ve also included links to where the images came from in the text. Enjoy.

First, a map of the U.S. with dot to show just how teeny weeny I.V. is compared to the rest of the country. That dot even exaggerates how much land I.V. encompasses. I just don’t want any of you to lose perspective.

Of course, there’s the requisite Google map of I.V. It’s annoyingly plain and boring and doesn’t even get close to telling the map viewers what kind of greatness lies within the city.

All right, now here’s the Google satellite shot of this little nook of a city. We’re getting a little closer to what I.V. really is — the highlighted parks on the edge of the cliffs are catching my eye — but I still think we have a ways to go.

That’s a bit better. This is a map of I.V. according to the Isla Vista Recreation and Parks District, appropriately highlighting all of the parks they’re in charge of. If you look closely (better click here [link: http://www.ivparks.org/map/map.html] for a larger and clearer version), you’ll see that the park that extends from behind Pardall Road to the end of the Embarcadero Loop, commonly referred to as Anisq’Oyo’ Park, is actually made up of three different areas: Anisq’Oyo’, People’s Park, and Perfect Park.

“What the heck is this mumbo jumbo, Nicki?!” That, my friend, is the proposed zoning map for land use in I.V. from the Santa Barbara County Web site. If the I.V. Master Plan goes through as proposed, this is what I.V. will look like (click here for a map you can zoom in on).

This rainbow of a map is the county’s attempt at defining each area of I.V. This amusing diagram is possibly the most accurate one of I.V. to date, although I would re-do a few things. “Single Family Housing Area” is technically appropriate, but to match the rest of the tone of the legend, it should really be called “The Quiet Zone.” The “Party Scene” section should fade as it goes toward the 6700 block. And let’s be real: if you’re drunk and looking for a beer pong ball, any cliff is beach access. I kid! I kid!

Whoa, a blast from the past! Jog back in time a little bit and check it out: I.V. in the late 1960s. Don’t believe me? Squint your eyes and you can see a black box in the middle of the loop labeled “B of A”—the infamous Bank of America that burned down in 1970.

And this neon highlighter beauty? This is a course map for the disc golf course that spans between Sueno Road and Abrego Road. The course—called the Isla Vista Peace Course, because we are a town full of hippies—is a nine-hole par 27.

Maybe you’re not the frolf type. Fear not, I.V. still has something for you in the way of fresh fruit trees! Yes sir, someone — Matthew Dursum, to be specific — went though the painstaking effort of finding and documenting all of the publicly accessible fruit trees in the area, and he even categorized them by seasons and types on his Web site. Happy hunting, hungry Isla Vistans.

As a grand conclusion, I’ve included this Google map highlighting the ever-changing yet ever-present construction at UCSB. For the full effect of this map, you have to click here and read mapmaker Erik’s sarcastic and hilarious comments. For example, here’s what he has to say regarding the repaving of Highway 217 in October 2008: “Unneeded resurfacing of the 217 caused closures WHILE THE EL COLEGIO ENTRANCE TO CAMPUS WAS ALSO UNDER CONSTRUCTION SIMULTANEOUSLY. BRILLIANT.”

With all the construction on Pardall Road and demolishing of various houses, who knows what I.V. will look like in a few years? Maybe we’ll see the addition of a monorail to whoosh residents from one end of I.V. to the other. Hey, a girl can dream!

Related Links

• Previous Eye On IV columns

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